I started a book on marriage that details an "ordinary marriage" gone terribly awry.
However, the point of the book that an "ordinary" marriage is one gone awry. We shouldn't have ordinary marriages; we should have extraordinary marriages.
The book is aimed at people who are struggling, and we most certainly are not. I just am passionate about seeing how marriages often go wrong and working on not allowing ours to go there.
The first point that hit home with me was the fact that when we're dating, we're super intentional about making life awesome for our mates. We stop by and buy them coffee. We surprise them with their favorite candy. We buy tickets for them so we can go out to their favorite concert or a movie they want to see. When we're married, we stop that. I usually look at the budget and think, "We can save that money instead of spending it."
Where we live, a seasonal restaurant opens this time of year, and it's usually packed when it does. I was driving home from a radio interview for work and realized that the restaurant had opened. It was 11:45 a.m.
"I'll stop and get lunch for Nate."
"No. That's not in the budget."
"If we were dating, I would stop and surprise him with lunch."
That wasn't a conversation with someone else. It was the debate that went on in my head about 500 yards before the turn off.
I turned the corner, gauging traffic in the parking lot to make my decision.
It was busy. But I pulled in.
You know what, that lunch that we shared when we both came home from work that day and ate tacos we haven't had in months, that was an awesome lunch. We smiled and laughed.
I have to say, $17 in tacos was a splurge.
And it was totally worth it.
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