Sermon notes --- Everything might not be OK

God has a plan for your life and everything will be OK.

Oh how many times I have heard that said to someone in trouble and oh how many times I have said a variation on that phrase.

But I know someone who doesn't like the plan for her life. She is just waiting for everything to be OK, and it's not. It has been years, her whole life, and nothing is as she wants. So what do you say to that?

Joseph experienced a lot of years like that. Through his teen years everything was great but then he was sold into slavery by his brothers and everything went downhill --- for 20+ years!

It says in Genesis that "God was with Joseph." Joseph couldn't see that. He couldn't feel it. He couldn't see God working. But God was there with his child. Just because life isn't going the way you want doesn't mean God is against you or has left you.

When Joseph was in Potiphar's house, Potiphar's wife wanted to sleep with Joseph. He could have figured that God had left him and not worried about sinning at that point. However, Joseph stayed true even though it didn't feel good. Potiphar's wife actually clawed the clothes off of him, but he shoved her off and literally ran away. That's what we are to do --- flee youthful passions, run from sexual immorality, get away from temptation. Literally move away from temptation. This isn't a figurative instruction to run/resist; we are to actually get up and get out of the tempting situation. Otherwise, we will talk ourselves right into what we don't want to do.

I love this example --- we don't put a fish on a hook. We tempt the fish to put itself on the hook. If it ran from the worm, it wouldn't get caught. However, the longer it floats and stares at the worm, it talks itself into taking a bite.

But even if we do the right thing, that doesn't guarantee everything will work out perfectly in that moment --- in that moment. Joseph was thrown into prison after running from Potiphar's wife. But that was a bad situation on the way to much better things later in his life. God did not leave him.

So the sentiment of "God has a plan for your life and everything will be OK" is partially true. God does have a plan for our lives, and often God does step in and make everything OK, but not always. Sometimes life is icky and we just have to honor God through it. Then in heaven we will receive our reward, and that eternity in heaven is so much better than the short time on Earth. So use this time of trial to build up the best rewards possible for you in heaven. 

People hear what they want to hear

People hear what they want to hear.

It's one of the reasons that I don't enjoy debating. For adults anyway, once someone has made up his or her mind, it is incredibly hard to change it because two people can take the exact same sentence and dependent on their views hear it in completely different ways.

That is incredibly apparent during this horrible political season. Hillary Clinton can make a statement, and Republicans will run with it, saying how absolutely ridiculous what she said is and how can anyone vote for someone who believes that? A Democrat will take that exact same statement, view it in a completely different way and say, "How can someone not stand for that?" The same goes for anything said by Donald Trump, if you like him you will view what he says in a completely different way than if you hate him.

We hear what we want to hear.

I think this was also apparent in the manhood/womanhood debate at church. What the pastor said didn't bother me, because the headship of a husband in a home and a man in a church is something I already believe in. I believe the Bible specifically calls for this.

Someone who doesn't believe this and thinks woman can and should lead just as much as men twisted the pastor's words and made them into something they weren't. That's because they heard something completely different because they heard what they wanted to hear. They wanted to hear something outrageous so they didn't have to follow the truth in the sermon, so they twisted the words into something else until it was outrageous enough for them.

It's like this at work, with your children, with your spouse --- if you are looking for something to fault, you can most likely twist words in your head enough to find fault with them. You can hear exactly what you want to hear.

We need to address situations with openness and try to see what people are really saying, not just what you think they are saying. It doesn't mean you'll agree with everything, but you might find much less fault with the people around you than you do right now.

He handed me a plate

We were at a wedding reception yesterday sitting with some friends, and one of them made a comment that she has made several times before when we've been together.

"You guys are cute," she said. "You really love each other."

Nate and I always look at each other with amused looks, because we're never quite sure what we've done that has made her say that. It's not like we are kissy or hand-holdy, because we really don't show public displays of affection.

"We do love each other," I said. That's really the only way I know how to react to that.

It came up later that night too, with a member of the groom's family.

"You guys were so cute at the food table," she said.

I laughed and questioned, the food table? I guess Nate had leaned over and given me a kiss when we were getting tacos, which is a little unusual for him. That must be what she meant.

"Yeah, you were so cute. He handed you a plate," she said.

He handed me a plate? It was adorable that he handed me a plate? I just laughed and thanked her.

Nate and I talked about it later. What must a typical marriage be like that my husband handing me a plate is adorable?

But those comments make me step back and take a good look at my husband and our marriage. The little things that I take for granted are absolutely huge and adorable to someone else. I have to make sure not to get caught up in the day-to-day and remember that it truly is those thoughtful little things that make our life together wonderful. Yes, my husband is a sweet man, and the fact that he thinks about my needs and hands me a plate is truly a blessing.

A woman's place is behind her man

Wow, I can't believe it's been more than a month since I was last on here! Time flies so fast this time of year, and I don't intentionally lose touch but I just don't open the computer as often during the summer.

I have plenty of blog inspiration at the moment, but the biggest has come from a recent sermon at church. Our pastor started a series on current cultural issues, and the first one to tackle was the issue of manhood and womanhood, especially in their daily roles in life, work and the church.

I thought it was a wonderful sermon, but the pastor said he knew he was going to upset people and get flack for sharing what the Bible said about a man's place as leader and a woman's place as support. I completely agreed with what he said, and my sister-in-law, who was visiting with her family, came up to me afterward asking if I thought people actually had an issue with what the pastor talked about.

"I would hope in the Christian community there wouldn't be any issues, but I really don't know how people will react," I said.

So I asked the pastor what he had heard about the first in a two-part series on biblical manhood and womanhood, and he said many people were genuinely upset.

About what?

The Bible clearly states over and over again that men are to be the leaders. Men are supposed to take care of their families; they are supposed to work; they are supposed to be the spiritual leaders of their homes and of the church. Eve was created as a helper, a support, a companion for Adam, and the role of woman has not wavered since then. Women are to take care of their husbands and children, to support the mission of the family and the church.

I don't really understand what there is to argue about in that, theologically speaking. Culturally speaking, women are definitely on the rise. Women are leading companies, are running for governmental office and are "wearing the pants" in marriages and family relationships. Men have stopped standing up for themselves and have so worried about upsetting their wives that they just get run over.

It says in Genesis that after the fall women would yearn for their husbands, and that meant their husbands' positions. It means that sin made women want to be in charge, and sin is so obvious in so many relationships. Women are supposed to be the helper, but they are not, when it comes down to it, in charge.

That sounds horrible. But really, it is a joy to not have the responsibility of the final decision. A man is responsible for his entire family and their decisions. If his wife or children mess up, ultimately it is on him. That is what would really stink, so I'm glad I'm a woman. I want my man to lead me and set an example and be the one to rely on. I don't want that job.

A friend mentioned that one thing she didn't like in the sermon was that our pastor said women, seen in the example of Eve, are more easily tempted and that's one reason that they are not supposed to be in charge. That sounds harsh, but I have to say, I also agree with that. It's one reason that I don't think we should have a woman president --- hormones.

When it is a certain time of the month, or pretty much all the time once Aunt Flow stops showing up, women have crazy hormonal reactions. Even when it's not the once-a-month hormones, women are just more emotional in general. It causes us to react to situations quickly and with heart, but those initial reactions are often not rational. When I react off-the-cuff, I often look back and realize I should have taken more time to rationally think something through. In general, men look at things with a more rational eye. So yes, I do think that women's emotional and hormonal reactions get them into trouble, and we are more inclined to fall into sin in that way. I can't argue with that.

I'm super curious to see what the second in this series includes. How many more women will be upset when the truth is preached? Yet again, we need to listen and think, not just react on how our emotions are hurt when hearing that we might not be as important as we think we are.

Make wise choices, they will direct more than just your life

In Genesis 36, Moses wrote about Esau's lineage, and it showed how his life ended up different from Jacob.

First, Esau didn't marry godly women like Jacob waited to do. They ended up leading his family away from the Lord. It says in 2 Corinthians, "Do not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever." It doesn't seem as big of a deal to date someone that is not a Christian, but we marry the people we date.  And a good and healthy marriage is impossible without the center point of Christ.

There are so many points in life that I so do not want to hold my tongue, that I don't want to put my husband first, that I don't want to clean the house, that I don't want to wait until my husband and I can see the movie together --- the moments that my desires are selfish instead of selfless, that's when I have to turn to Jesus. And I know my husband has the same thing. Without God, I can guarantee our marriage would be much angrier, much unhappier and much less solid.

Esau also wasn't careful about where his family lived. He took his family outside of the Promised Land. It's important where we live. It's important the environment our children are in. Can I relate this to the black lives matter movement? The biggest point against what this movement seems to stand for is that the biggest violence against blacks is blacks, but they don't seem to make a big deal of this. "That's just the culture where we live. We have to deal with it. That's the only place we can afford." I bet that's true in big cities, but take your family to a small town and you will be amazed at what you can afford. Esau thought he had to leave the Promised Land to have enough room for all his stuff, but had he prioritized his family he would have chosen where to live on different parameters. We should all pick where we live based on what is best for our families.

Esau's family does become a ruling family where it settled down. His sons and grandsons became chiefs, which means rulers over 1,000 plus. One of Esau's wives was Oholibamah, who was a part of a ruling family, so many of the men in their family also became rulers. That looks good, but Esau was becoming assimilated into an ungodly culture. He was no different than anyone else.

The judgment on the Edomites, Esau's family, has lasted generation after generation. From Old Testament times to today in the Middle East, God's judgement has been on that land. We never think that what we do will affect our families for that long, but it can. From who we marry to where we live, it's these decisions that make up a life, a family and a future. Make wise choices.

Reminders to be thankful for everyday moments

I think the events of this week have really made me take pause and think about what's important in life, about treasuring everyday moments when, like the families of the officers in Dallas, those moments can be over so quickly and without notice.

So, what are you thankful for today? What are those little moments that you'll remember today?

1. When I'm cooking and my husband walks through the kitchen, wraps his arms around me and kisses me on the cheek.
2. When my dog has free reign outside and chooses to sit on the porch and watch the world go by, just like a little person.
3. A "Love you back" text.
4. A video of a friend's baby walking.
5. A picture of a friend enjoying her birthday and smiling with her husband.
6. A compliment on my newest cupcake experiment, Boston Creme Pie cupcakes.
7. A text from your mom telling you about a house for sale six hours from you just because she wishes you would move closer to home.

It's not about the washing machine that's not working, the house that needs painting, the cleaning on the to-do list --- it's about appreciating those everyday moments that make up a life.

The 5-foot root

It's been a busy few weeks and my blogging has lapsed unintentionally. As a welcome back, I'm not going to delve into the political climate or the events of this week that have brought me to tears and to unfriending a few people on Facebook who don't support law enforcement, instead I'm going to talk about a little lesson that I came across a week or so ago.

I decided it was time to buckle down and work on the house, and in order to scrape and paint, some weedy bushes needed to come out.

So I went to start cutting branches and digging at root systems, which turned out easier said than done. When I had gotten the largest branches out of the way, I had to get the rocky landscaping out of the way. A few rocks in a single layer I figured.

Wrong.

One layer of rock. Two layers of rock. Three layers of rock. A layer of black plastic, and wait more rock.

What? Two layers of rock and plastic? Who does this?

I dug down, and got one root out, and then saw that this root jutted out horizontally and another bush was coming from the same root a few feet away. The entire structure was actually one plant.

An hour later and plenty of sweat later, I couldn't go on. Literally. I was jumping on the shovel and it wasn't budging. I physically couldn't dig any deeper and I physically could not loosen this root, so I packed up and waited for my husband.

The next day, I was at work and he had a day off, and I get a video of him trying to pull this bush root out with a wire winched to the four-wheeler. It wasn't budging.

Then I got another video showing the 5-foot root that had finally come up, breaking the four-wheeler winch while it was at it.

Now, go with me here, because Nate said this is a stretch, but I think those bushes were a whole lot like sin. I could get the small bushes that were growing nearby out pretty easily, but I pulled them when they were little and young. But the longer we left these bushes, the more they grew and the deeper their roots were. By the time they were developed, it took more than the little bit of pruning that I could do. We needed help from some heavy machinery.

Sin is easy to get rid of when it is small. And you can probably do it yourself, of course with the forgiveness of God. But when sin starts to dig in, it's not only incredibly difficult to get out but it's also impossible to do on your own. You're going to need the help of others to eradicate sin from your life, the support of others, the strength of others.

Don't let sin become a 5-foot root that won't budge. Take notice of it when it's little and don't let it get a foothold.