The little nagging desire

I've never really thought I had a problem with jealousy.

I grew up with a lot of friends who were wealthy - at least their parents were - and I never thought that I wasn't as good as them or didn't have as good of a life because I didn't have everything they had.

I often think to be jealous of someone, you have to want whatever stuff they have - their big house, their nice car, their expensive clothes. I didn't want any of that, so jealousy wasn't a problem in my life.

However, I am starting to realize that I am jealous a lot. I covet a lot of what people have - although most of it isn't material possessions.

There are things in my life that I wish I had and I just don't yet. Much of my life I have felt OK with not having things because I knew that I could work toward what I want and eventually get it. However, there are things now that I can't work toward. I just have to wait until they happen. That is hard for me.

And when people get what I want without having to wait as long or work as hard, I start to get jealous and I covet that. I just want it. Why can't I have it?

I've had things like that for a long time, but I never really pinned it down as jealousy until this week.

Then we were singing a worship song in church on Sunday - I wish I could remember which one - and it talked about the importance of the cross.

Sure, the cross is important.

Yet, when you think about it. The cross is the only important thing in life. We get caught up wanting what we want, when we want it. When we don't get it we get jealous and covet and mad and upset. Why Lord why?

Yet, he already gave us all we need. He gave us a savior who died to fix all the mess-ups we've ever done, EVER!

Those nagging little desires, they seem important in the grand scheme of things. But compare them to the importance of the cross. All of the sudden even the most important desires in our lives seem to pale in comparison.

That doesn't mean I'm going to stop wanting things. However, I need to remember the ranks of how important those things are compared to how important God is to me.