Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Getting over me

This morning, Novie wanted to go outside about 7:45. I so did not want to get up, when I had to get up in about 45 minutes anyway. I wanted to just chill in bed until I had to start working.

However, she had to go, and I had to be the one to let her out so I rolled out of bed.

I grabbed my sweatpants and tossed them at her, just to let her know I was not happy about her making me get up.

I thought about the people that I know who are pregnant or have recently had children, and how they have to get up even more than I do to take care of their children. I wonder if they are annoyed or if they just love their children so much that they don't mind.

I don't think I'm ready to have children. Other than the fact that I'm not married, which would definitely be the prerequisite for having kids, I think I am way too selfish.

I've always thought I was a pretty giving person. I like to give things away and buy things for people. However, when it comes to doing things I don't want to, I guess I am a little more selfish than I thought. When I'm tired, I want to sleep. When I'm crabby I want to be alone and not talk. When I'm stressed I want to just hole up. If someone wants me to do something other than that, I don't really want to, and I can kind of be a crab butt when I don't get my way.

When I was younger, I always thought that I would be married and have children by my age. I guess I can't really control that I haven't, but I don't think I would be ready to have kids even if I was married. I need to get over myself and the need to do whatever I want.

Who knew a puppy could be teaching me so much?

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