Too open

Whew, life has been busy lately. I have fallen a bit behind in the whole blogging thing.

For premarital counseling, I've been reading a book by Joshua Harris. He is super honest in it, talking about situations in his life that I don't think I would ever say.

While reading it, I kind of wonder if he ever wrote down sections and then stared at them, deciding if it was too risky to admit all of that. I wonder if he ever felt like people would judge him for his confessions.

I have to say sometimes I think that I am an introvert, because I don't feel comfortable with people knowing everything about me. I guess I'm a private person and afraid of what people will think of me. I have written a paragraph before and deleted it, my cheeks flaming red, before I could let such a big part of myself out into the world.

Maybe that's what has made Harris famous. People can connect to them, because they see that he is open and honest.

However, when I blog, I know pretty much who is going to read it. It's all people that are close to me. I think I might be able to be more open with my flaws with people I didn't know and might never meet. That may seem opposite though. Shouldn't I let the people closest to me know the real me? I worry about what those people think though, not about what people I don't know think about me.

Maybe I'm too self-conscious. I think I've always been that way though. I like to keep stuff inside instead of worrying about judgement.