You can sleep when you're dead

I used to find Nate crazy when he'd stay up to all hours and then say "You can sleep when you're dead."

However, these past few weeks I think that my outlook on that has been changing. I think caffeine has been my lifesaver in that.

This week has been super fun. Well, minus the amount of work I've had to do. The evidence of the fun is the fact that my apartment is extremely messy because I haven't been there to pick up or even wash dishes. Stuff is just piling up as I drop it before I go to sleep.

Since Nate and I both had nights off Wednesday and Thursday, we made the most of them. Wednesday we had sushi and walked around the mall before going boating with friends, until about 1:30 a.m. Thursday we went out to dinner, took another boat ride and finished up the night with a midnight viewing of "Ted."

Even today, since I had two and a half hours before I went back to work for the evening, we spent some time with a friend. Then tomorrow I get up early and head out of town for a bridal shower.

There have been some late nights, but when I decide whether to hit the hay or stay up to spend time with Nate and other friends, I realize that I want to make memories and have fun instead of spending time in bed.

Life is short and so much more fulfilling when you cherish it and make the most of it. I still enjoy my sleep, don't get me wrong. I don't super enjoy waking up early still. However, I wouldn't trade fun moments for a few more winks.

I think I'm starting to like the phrase, "You can sleep when you're dead."

Never broken

On FoxNews today, there was an article about the rising percentage of divorces among Baby Boomers. Even couples who have been together for 30 or 40 years are suddenly deciding to split up.

As someone getting ready to get married, I hate reading about that. Honestly, it's kind of terrifying.

I know that both Nate and I see marriage as a lifetime commitment. We are both so sure about each other and about our love. We know what we're getting into with each other. We may not know all the problems and temptations we'll encounter, but we have faith in each other and in God to get us through.

The good news in the article is that the divorce rate in younger generations seems to be decreasing. It said that people in our generation have a renewed zeal for marital and the traditional family.

I wonder if part of the reason that our marriages are lasting is that we have seen too much divorce in the older generations. Our parents, our friends' parents, even some of our older friends have gone through the pain of divorce. Even though people think all of their problems will be solved with divorce, we have seen that separation often adds even more heartache and problems.

I guess it's a little scary deciding to make a commitment to someone in a life that is full of temptation and questions. Will I be a good enough wife? Will I satisfy him so that he won't need to look elsewhere for companionship and happiness? Will I be able to put aside my selfish desires to support my husband as much as I should?

I want to make Nate so, so happy that he will never for a moment regret his decision to marry me. I don't us to ever add to that divorce statistic. I pray that our cord of three strands - us and God - will never be broken.

Really?

Recently, a Youtube video showed a bus monitor getting yelled at and made fun of, literal verbal abuse, by children on board.

It made the news, and I really do hope that those children are dealt with.

People felt so bad for the woman that they started to donate money for her to go away and take a dream vacation. Today, I read a news article that donations had jumped up to $500,000.

That's wonderful that people want to contribute to this woman. But I have to say, I was flabbergasted that this is what people are donating to. There are so many needy people who don't have jobs, who are starving, who need to hear about Christ. There are so many important Christian organizations in need. Yet people are donating a half million dollars to a woman who got made fun of.

Like I said, I'm glad that people are aware of this horrible situation and want to help rectify it, but I still think that's a little, a lot, of overkill. I wonder what the woman will do with all that money.

Pure love

I just had to share this everyday moment.

Novie loves me way too much. I was on the couch, writing a story for work, and she decided that sitting by me was not close enough. And instead she wanted to lay on top of me.

But it was hilarious and made me smile. I love my dog so much.

Keep my eyes open

I don't really know what to blog about today. Honestly that makes me a little concerned just because I wonder if I'm not focusing on the right things in life.

I haven't been very contemplative lately, and although I've kept up pretty well with bible reading, it's been by listening to it be read aloud in the car.

I guess I have just been taking daily life at face value and not reading much into it, but I wonder how many lessons I've been missing in doing that.

I believe in the importance of daily life and everyday moments. I think that God uses small things to teach us big lessons. I need to keep my eyes and heart open to that more I guess.

Forever friends

We have a couple of friends coming to town this afternoon, a couple who used to live here but moved away for a new job in a bigger city.

She was invited to my bridal shower on Saturday - my first one! - and they decided to take a little vacation and come up for about a week.

We had a lot of good times together, even before I moved to town. I used to visit when Nate lived here, and I would come for the weekends. Then all of us would spend time together, or I would hang out with them while Nate worked.

Not just with them, but it's easy to get back into the flow with old friends. You just pick up like time hasn't left off since you were last together. You catch up a little about what has happened while you're away, but really you just start to make new memories instead of talking about situations that didn't share the both of you.

That makes me miss my friends from college too. We are so good at picking up like life hasn't changed. However, my friends are moving, buying houses, and I'm getting married. With huge changes in our lives, will we always be able to pick it up like that? Or will it get weird when we haven't seen each other for a long time?

It reminds me of an "Adventures in Odyssey" episode that I listened to recently. A pair of friends made a pact at camp that they would meet at that spot every five years after they graduated from high school. They met the first year and then moved the reunions to 10 years.

10 years!

I can't imagine not seeing my friends for 10 years! Yet, on there they seemed like they still loved each other and were still friends.

I know it's just fiction, but I hope that my friends and I will be like that. I don't know where Nate and I will end up, but no matter what friends we leave behind, I hope that we're not leaving them behind forever.

Everyday weekend

It was a nice weekend, chock full of special, everyday moments.

I only got four hours of sleep after working late on Friday night, but I wanted to get up and have breakfast with Nate before I left for my hometown. It's so nice to spend time with him first thing in the morning. It just makes the rest of the day better.

When I got home, I got to have a delicious Father' Day lunch of ribs, baked beans, french fries, buttery Wonder bread and root beer at a local rib joint. We don't necessarily talk about anything deep or amazing, but it was fun just laughing and spending time together. We even stopped at a secondhand store and got a book for a crafty project.

I attended my friend's engagement party, and it was nice to see her in her element, with a whole group of new friends from dental school.

Then I grabbed some ice cream from a local joint, and just spent a little time with my parents. It felt so good to give them a little something and to surprise them. I was just in such a joyful mood and so happy that I wanted to give back a little something.

Exclaiming over a little baby at church, chatting with some people I grew up with, grabbing pizza at my grandparent's house and shopping for some crafts. It was a full Sunday, but also a good one.

Then it was wonderful to get home. I know I was only gone for a day, but I missed Nate. I loved coming home to my little apartment and my man. I have a wonderful life, and I couldn't ask for anything else.

Grab some coffee, or some caramels

I think it's important to show people that you care about them.

I guess this kind of goes along with my blog on Tuesday, but even more than just your lover, it's important to show other people.

Spending time with someone is a great way to show that you care. This weekend I am heading to my hometown, for less than 24 hours total, because my friend from high school is having an engagement party there. I debated but decided that I wanted to be there to show her my support. If it was me, I would appreciate having her there. It might be a long drive, but I think that gesture will mean a lot.

Also, this afternoon, I had quite a few items on my to-do list to complete before heading back to work at 7:30 p.m. However, a friend of mine in town wanted to get some frozen yogurt.

I haven't seen her in a while, and I wanted to, but I knew I had a lot to do before I left town. However, I finally decided that I should make time for a friend, because it's important to show someone that you care. So I asked her to go get some frozen yogurt with me.

It ended up that she couldn't before I had to head to work, but hopefully it made her feel wanted just that I asked. Even if it didn't, I tried!

Everyday moments are great, and everyday life is precious. However, everyday life can also get in the way of spending simple moments with family and friends, when you're too concentrated on doing chores and making dinner that you don't show people that you care with your time.

Have a chat, eat some caramels together, just enjoy someone's company and show them that you care.

Wanted

Listening to the radio on the way back from a couple of interviews today, I heard a song by Hunter Hayes that I haven't heard before.

Wanted

"You know I'd fall apart without you.
I don't know how you do what you do,
'Cause everything that don't make sense about me
Makes sense when I'm with you.
Like everything that's green, girl I need you.
But it's more than one and one makes two.
Put aside the math and the logic of it,
You gotta know you want it too

"'Cause I wanna wrap you up,
Wanna kiss your lips.
I wanna make you feel wanted.
And I wanna call you mine,
Wanna hold you hand forever,
Never let you forget it.
Yeah, I wanna make you feel wanted."

You know what makes a great relationship? Making somebody feel wanted.

Nate and I don't have the perfect relationship, but it's perfect to us because we make each other feel wanted and needed. I don't know what I would do without him. And all the little things - washing dishes, making him sandwiches while he's playing video games - are worth it when I feel wanted.

Tonight, and for the rest of the summer, I have to attend a local summer theatre for work. Nate doesn't enjoy going to the shows. However, he said he'll go tonight and next week just because we don't have much time together this month due to his work schedule. He wants to spend time with me, and I appreciate that more than I can say.

Home design

Happy Monday!

I don't really have anything to show for it, because I can't start yet, but I am getting so excited to make a home for Nate and myself.

I was working on the registry this weekend, deciding on what colors we would have in each room so I could register for the right items. It would be nice to get an entire room at a time, but that's just not going to happen. For budgetary reasons and the fact that we don't know where we will be living after we get married, I can't do everything.

However, I still have found joy in imagining. Nate doesn't really care what design decisions I make so this is what I have come up with as far as colors.

Kitchen: Black and silver with bright accents like lime green, orange and teal
Living room: Gray with coral, a darker green and possibly yellow
Master suite: Dark brown with aqua, in bedroom and bathroom
Spare bedroom: Dark brown with lime and turquoise

I have found fun items like bedspreads, and I have plenty of ideas for do-it-yourself plans. I can't wait to have a sewing machine so I can make my own throw pillows, and maybe even curtains. It can't be too difficult can it?

I set my dad on one project today - like this photo that I took at a local consignment shop.



I told Nate he could do it, but we don't have many tool, so I want my dad to make an initial out of a book. As a writer, what better item to match my personality?

Eighty-three days to our wedding. I can't wait!

What am I watching?

Whew, it's been quite the week!

Sometimes blogging gets put on the back burner when I get busy. Wednesday Nate got home, and we had one evening to spend together before work claimed his time again. Then yesterday I spent a few hours getting my wedding dress fitted - exciting!

I have been trying to more closely pay attention to what I watch and listen to, inspired by one of the books that I read for premarital counseling. It talked about the importance of what we put into our minds, even if unconscious.

I thought about the shows that I watch, and I know that pretty much each of the shows have something in it that are not great examples. It's depressing to think about, because I have some of my favorite shows, and I don't really want to give them up. They're probably not affecting me that much, but when I have something like that on all the time, I think that it adds up a lot.

I have turned my attention to more shows on HGTV, the Food Network and even the History Channel.

On the radio, instead of listening to as much comedy - which often has dirty stories or swear words that pop up without notice - I have listened to a little more music. I also saw that I instead of foregoing my daily Bible reading, which I have been doing a lot lately, I can listen to it from my phone. They have a reader's Bible, which Nate discovered when playing around.

What are you watching?

Top 10 thanks for today

1. Only 89 days until I get to marry the man that I will forever love.
2. The ability to do the Insanity workout, even though I complain about it.
3. A job that lets me do fun activities like visiting the planetarium this morning.
4. Working from home.
5. A sleepy puppy who loves to cuddle.
6. Busy weekends this summer, because that means lots of celebrating with family and friends.
7. A field full of yellow flowers that I saw yesterday and almost blinded me because they were so bright but also so unique and beautiful.
8. Beautiful summer days with warm weather and clear skies.
9. Text messages to share quick sentiments.
10. The money to buy birthday presents and even myself a few items when I see good deals.

What are you thankful for today?

Going "Insane"

My feet are burning. Sweat is soaking my hairline and pouring down my chest. My breath is labored.

I’m basically just hot and tired.

When the trainer on the Insanity video asks how I’m doing, I glare. When he asks if I’m ready for the next circuit, I say, ‘No.’

This has been a pretty regular occurrence since I started the Insanity workout program at the beginning of April. Technically it’s a 60-day program, and I should be ending it this week.

However, quite a while ago I gave up on the 60-day thing. I decided that I didn’t need to lose weight and just wanted to get in shape, so I’ve been using it as a regular workout a few days a week.

My soon-to-be-sister-in-law, Erin, started the workout about a month after I did, and she’s almost to the same point I am. She’s dedicated and has actually done it every day she is supposed to.

Workout programs, reading schedules and other activities I’m supposed to do every day make me feel like such an undedicated person - is that a word?

I like to do activities, but having to do something every day is really hard for me, especially exercising. I hate exercise, and I also hate having my free time used up for something that I don’t want to do. Like most people, I want the results, and I love it when Nate compliments me on how toned I’m getting, but I still don’t like doing it. (If Nate didn’t compliment me, I probably still wouldn’t be doing it. Thank goodness for his motivation.)

I guess dedication to simple daily tasks are a reflection of our inner selves. We have to practice with small tasks like these in order to be successful in the major parts of our lives that take dedication, especially marriage and children.

I guess I should look at my workout as a practice instead of the way I look at it now - horridness. (I don't think that's a word either...)

"Feminine Appeal"

My next assignment for premarital counseling is to read "Feminine Appeal" by Carolyn Mahaney.

While I was laying on the roof to soak up some sun, I was reading the first couple of chapters.

I highlighted a couple of passages when Mahaney talked about recognizing sin in yourself and how that affects your marriage. She said, "When we're not experiencing loving feelings toward our husbands, that's an alarm going off: ding, ding, ding. There may be sin that needs attention."

Usually when I don't have loving feelings toward Nate, I get absorbed in it and start thinking about all the things that are wrong with him. I can't say I've ever started examining myself and seeing what is wrong with me that I am feeling that way.

"When we see our husbands as sinners like ourselves - sinners in need of God's grace and mercy - it strips away any intolerant, critical or demanding attitude we may be tempted to have," she said.

Again, life and relationships are all the way that we look at things. Mahaney mentioned another author who said that even if our mate is only 80 percent, that we should concentrate on the 80 percent and not waste our lives trying to fix the other 20.

Talking about yourself

I was passing by a local business that always has life lessons and catchy phrases on its electronic sign, and I really liked what it said today.

"What you speak about others speaks a lot about yourself."

I realize that gossip is wrong, but the reason I usually think of is that gossip is often judgmental. Many of the stories that we repeat about people have facts missing and aren't passed along for reasons other than anger, annoyance or glee at someone else's misfortune.

I like this phrase though, because it reminds us that whenever we talk about other people we should really consider what we are saying, because we are also telling a lot about ourselves.

If we make fun of what people wear, judge them for mistakes they've made or talk about their relationship problems, we show what we are thinking. We show that we care more about the outside than the inside of a person, that we are self-righteous enough to think that we are better than their mistakes or that our life is perfect compared to someone else's.

Take record of what you say and see what it says about you.