The clock is ticking; the kitchen sink is dripping; the cars outside are floating past; the keys are clicking beneath my fingers. The refrigerator just switched on.
That is all that's going on.
I had the night off work last night, and I wondered what I was going to do with the free time. I have had so many full days and nights in these past two months. Every moment I didn't have planned seemed like it was taken up with cleaning or getting ready for the planned events - Thanksgiving, trips to Omaha and South Dakota, Christmases. It was the season of busyness.
However, this weekend, nothing was scheduled. I was almost nervous, hardly remembering how to spend time when I didn't have anything on my schedule. I felt uncomfortable last night trying to relax by myself.
Today, I woke up without an alarm. I stayed in bed and read part of the last book in the Katie Weldon series by Robin Jones Gunn, a continuation from one of my favorite series' about Christy Miller. I drank some coffee while watching TV. I took some time to pamper myself. I walked to Fareway to fulfill my ice cream craving. I finished my book.
Goodness, I had forgotten how good it feels to just be. How good it feels to remember who you are and who God is. How good life is by itself without incessant schedules pushing on me all the time.
I was stressed out. Even work wasn't satisfying, because I just wanted to have a clear schedule and it never offered me that option.
This weekend has been exactly what I needed - a time to clear my head, to relax, to put off the laundry and the dishes because I have more time tomorrow. Oh how wonderful it is just to sit down and not worry about getting everything done, to see the list on the counter and to just ignore it.
Thank you Lord for life. Thank you for moments of revitalizing peace. Thank you for the people around me who I love. Thank you for you.